This blog was set up by my gf and she said she is stressed by my thoughts of not giving her up. I won't turn my back and not face this blog; I will continue to write even if she doesn't. It's like a mirror reflected upon oneself, since that day I took over the blog, I have written entries like never before, pouring out my thoughts as she wished me earlier in our relationship. Although I love her, I have to let go because it's her request that I leave her. She said that only treat her like a friend or sister, otherwise, she will avoid me. She also said I didn't appreciate her in the past and it's too late now. I have faith in us that she knows that I do appreciate her from the bottom of my heart.
I'm not all alone, I still have her and Godly counsels and angels around me. I've been in the wrong path but now learning to walk the right path, it took a detour of routes and events but getting back onto the right track is something rewarding. I remembered we back got together again after her Australia trip, she told me never ever said breakup again because it hurts. I can't agree more. During that time I was also sleepless and didn't had proper meals (thus lost weight as she noticed when she saw me again). I didn't let her know all this because I wanted to be appeared as a strong person which is very wrong. It's painful as I've experienced it but she said it'll be healed. I want to be ready for my future wife; a mature and responsible man. I will gain her trust and cherish her like never before. I do not want to blame anyone for this, I'm a responsible guy who will take the consequences of my actions willfully. Only promise when you mean it, as she taught me.
No matter how important she is to me, how much I love her, I don't think I want to let her know because it will only add on to her stress. Her wish is for me to give up on her, so I will. I will listen to her because I love her, will do all that makes her happy and peaceful, and that's how I will pray every time I miss her.
Love you always,
Mike Dearie
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Whatever you said, whatever you feel, I had been there... You once said that we could only be friends, take it or leave it. You gave me no choice. Y am I bringing back everything? Coz I learn from you, rem? I said I learn how to behave and I mirror you. Now, not giving you a chance, is my fault. Doesn't work that way, does it?
ReplyDeleteI'm amazed by how well you write although you claimed you are not a good writer but a better speaker. It's all about effort...
If you were given a chance, what will you do? Your answer and mine would not be too far apart, dearie. Having said that, I have been wrong and I truly meant it from the bottom of my heart. Once a criminal but I will try hard to be a good person again.
ReplyDeleteThanks dearie for your encouragement on my writing. Frankly, I was quite stressed because I know you marked a lot of compositions that your students have written and I'm not sure whether my standards are well-below par. I do put in a lot of effort in my translation of emotions into words; hopefully they weren't misunderstood.
Love you always.
Well, all along I think I dun meet ur expectation, even in writing despite Im an Eng teacher. Rem my report?
ReplyDeleteI dun penalise my friends or anyone, only colleagues and students for not writing well or speaking well...
Er, no dearie, your writing is perfect; just had misunderstanding that your report format looked quite weird but it was given by your Professor.
ReplyDeleteWell, please do point out if I make lots of mistakes; I'm sure there are tons. I need to improve my writings too, it's been a long time since I wrote a paper.